Jealousy

Jealousy involves strong emotions like anger and fear.

I once had a male client, who had this problem. He was exstremly jealous. His condition could be described as a mixture of desperation and powerlessness. Desperate because his relationship with his present sweetheart were cracking up, and powerless because he didn't manage to fight his pattern. He was very aware and consious of his jealousy, which just made the desperation and the powerlessness larger.

The unexpected and the loss of control

One of the reaction patterns that my client had was a strong fear for the unexpected. A reaction pattern that I recognize with a lot of my jealous clients It´s the persons controlling part, which here suffers a crack. The controlling part of the jealous person, is often overdemensioned, because he for anything in the world tries to avoid being rejectied by controling himself out of the situation. Foresee everything in a manner of speaking!

To control often is an impossible project..

Therefore the jealous person nearly always pushes the subject away from himself and creates the opposite effect of the desired. Nobody likes being controlled and the possessive feeling that often follows in the wake.

The treatment

is among other things to uncover and heal these rejections, so that the involved persons self-esteem can be rebuilt. If the persons jealousy is due to a more isolated situation, it can be healthy to work on the conviction that the person created in the involved situation. The world still is safe and good, even though I at one time experienced something unexpected.